This month, it has been Olympic Games with my body. To a point I didn’t even realize (besides looking at the calendar) Endo was flaring until it knocked me on my ass…And even then, a calendar this month was not helpful.

Today is Day 1 of my period…however, it is 4 days early… So, as you can imagine, early and a 10 hour work day…I was horribly unprepared. Thankfully I was wearing black winter leggings that the leakage didn’t show.

And the blood clots are huge.

What usually signals the start of an Endo flare is when my bladder goes into severe flare mode. This is where I’ll need to pee 600x a day for 1-3 days…and trust me, people hate me during this flare. Especially driving. However, this month though…it hasn’t flared, and if anything my kidneys feel dried up like a raisin (of course I’m staying well hydrated).

Appetite. Hm. Usually a week before my period. I crave everything. Salt. Sugar. Salt. Sugar… you get the point. This month? Nothing. I’ve had no appetite. It’s been force to get me to start eating. And even then, after three bites I can’t usually go further.

Exhaustion level. Has been about the same as last Endo flares. However this month it is taking my body 2-3x longer before it recovers.

Period pain usually comes a few days before…This time the pain started same day as my period…to a point a few times I curled over at work holding myself up with a counter. Then lying in bed later that day and the contractions are hitting every 4 mins.

I will try the exercise remedy, jumping on the ice at 10pm. And skating it off…but if it doesn’t work I am scared to see what will happen.

Pain killers are in my near future. I’m gonna use them to sleep.

Emotions. Usually they are completely out of whack weeks before. To a point anxiety hits and suicidal thoughts come… but this month besides one break down several days earlier (due to pain) they’ve been fine.

However now the mood swings and hormones are flaring. And I’m mid wanting to kill, mid breakdown and mid I want to jump off a cliff.

Symptoms that stayed the same: Severe breast pain a week before. A bit of crabbiness. Throwing up several times a day, mostly undigested food and yellow acidic bile (non forced).

Symptoms that changed: Stomach not swelling as much this month. Breasts doubled in size. Headaches have been coming. Dehydration. Body pain. Mood of happy to unhappy in 5 second span. Body pain. Got severely sick this week. Unable to skate/workout. Muscle contractions (especially in back).

Keeping fingers crossed that this month will go better.